videos, missing pictures, and awesome books

Y'all.  I'm so sorry that this 31 days of blogging has turned to hit-or-miss-whenever-Rebecca-gets-her-act-together days of blogging.

I'm still beating my personal record, though, so it's not all bad.

You know what's truly bad? Blogger still hates me and every video I've made in the past 4 days. I cannot for the life of me get any video to upload. So, even though I do have video of Ellie and the boys talking about adoption, I can't get it to post.

You know what's even worse? In the process of importing over 300 photos of everything from a family trip to DC to soccer games to a photo shoot Kyle did with the kids this weekend, something happened and they all disappeared. Poof! They're gone. 

So in the best interest of myself and to save you from a incoherent blog post due to my temporary insanity, I'm going to make this short.

This book?

If you have adopted, are in the process of adopting, are thinking of adopting, know someone who has adopted, or even just like the word "adopted" do yourself a favor and get your hands on a copy of this. Then lock yourself away from the world for a little while and read it. Trust me. It'll do you good.

Good news/bad news

The good news: I finally got the boys to cooperate and answer some questions on video. They had some great insights into what they remember and how they perceive adoption. Ellie got in on the action with her own video, too.

The bad news: Blogger hates me and refuses to upload my video. Okay, not really. But, I cannot get any videos to upload this morning. Should that change and Blogger decide to make friends again, I will update this page.

Until then - I leave you with this picture. Early days with Ellie were quite an adventure. Never knew what she'd look like after naptime. On this day, she climbed out of her crib to explore and discovered Desitin. She also decided her dress was not good enough and needed an extra touch of a pajama shirt.

big brothers

My plan was to post a video today of my boys talking about our adoption experience. However, when I pulled out my phone to actually do the video, the oldest acted like he was having coughing spasms, the middle one sat and stared at the wall, and the youngest hid his face like he was in the witness protection program and couldn't be seen. 

I will have victory, though, and there will be a video soon. Even if I have to bribe them with frozen yogurt.

Our trip home from the airport with Ellie was brutal. We lived about 30-40 minutes from the Atlanta airport (on a good traffic day, which is actually never in Atlanta). We loaded everyone in the van, all four of them still in booster or car seats. Ellie wasn't very fond of her seat, but I was sure that with Lucas' backseat entertainment, she'd be fine. I was very wrong. She screamed louder than any 3 month old I've ever heard. Shrieks of sheer terror, which made the boys not so happy with this new little sister. A few minutes into the drive, Kyle realized he had gone the wrong way, and we would now have to travel all the way around the city on I-285 (all you Atlanta people know exactly what I'm talking about!). This more than doubled our drive home. 

Ellie cried the entire. way. home.  I realized about halfway through the drive that she had never been in a car seat. Ever. They just weren't used in most of Guatemala, so babies were just held or carried in slings on taxis, buses, the back of motorcycles..... In fact, she had never been in anything that required her to be buckled in. And this baby was a fan of being free to move. Being buckled in was not her style. That should've been our first clue that eight years later, she'd still be moving constantly, and still HATE being buckled in!

Once home, the boys crowded around Kyle and "helped" feed her. They were smitten. They wanted to hold her, feed her, and bring her toys. They were immediately protective of their baby sister and bonded very quickly with her. 

In the days to come, she learned how much fun these boys were. She would light up when one of them walked in the room. They made her giggle and loved to entertain her. Jacob was only two, so we definitely had to keep an eye on him. He and Ellie quickly earned the nickname of "double trouble" after she learned to walk. 

People have often asked "how have your biological children dealt with having an adopted sister?" The answer is that they haven't "dealt" with it. There isn't really anything to deal with. As far as they are concerned there is no difference. She is their sister - no matter where she was born or how she came into our family. 

Only God could give my boys and Ellie such an immediate and lasting bond. Is everything always smiles and rainbows? Definitely not! But they love each other fiercely. I can't wait to see how their relationships deepen as they grow. And I pray that their experience with adoption will be a testimony to them of God's sovereignty and love for His children.

Here's hoping I have cooperative boys today and can get that video for tomorrow!

In the meantime, here are the boys helping Kyle feed Ellie a few minutes after we got home.

Welcome home!

To celebrate the fact that we were finally going home, I ordered room service for dinner. Authentic Guatemalan goodness. I can't remember what exactly was on my plate, but I think cardboard covered in ketchup would've been just fine with me that night. I do remember that, for the price, it should've come with a side of pure gold. 

The next day, we received Ellie's visa and I had to raise my right hand and swear that everything I had told them was true. That was it. No confetti, no congratulations from the embassy worker, no high fives. Just a "you're done" and a call for the next number in line. 

But inside, I was shouting with joy. Even though our process had been incredibly short compared to most, and our outcome was amazing, the past two weeks had been more than I was prepared for. I finally saw the proverbial light at the end of the tunnel.

I packed our things that night. Ellie slept soundly most of the night, but I didn't sleep much at all. Isn't that the way it goes?

We flew home the next day. My first experience flying with a baby. We managed to have an entire row to ourselves, so I spread out bottles, diapers, and blankets and made myself at home. There were a few other families flying home on our flight as well, and the flight attendants seemed very well versed in baby needs. Ellie did great. She slept most of the way and just before we arrived, I made sure to change her clothes for her big debut. A girl needs to be well-dressed (and free of spit up) when meeting important people. 

We made it into Atlanta at rush hour on a Friday evening.  I cried as our plane landed and whispered to Ellie "Welcome home!"

And here's where I need to mention that I didn't have a stroller or baby sling with me. Kyle had called Delta and requested there be one waiting at the gate for me. However, there was nothing when I arrived. I was too impatient to wait and figured how bad could it possibly be to just carry her? So off we went through the airport.

If you've ever come into Atlanta from out of the country, you know what's involved. Add to that a couple more stops through immigration and you have a very. long. process. I walked the length of the airport with a not-quite 3 month old in my arms, a carry-on bag on my shoulder, and pulling a large suitcase. I was finally able to drop our luggage off in another spot where it was sent to its final destination for pick-up.

(Note: When we came in from Guatemala last year, this process had changed and we only picked up our luggage once!) 

We stopped at customs and immigration and eventually, somehow, miraculously made it up the escalator where throngs of people were waiting. Through them all I spotted three excited little boys holding a bright pink sign that said "Welcome home, Ellie and Mommy" 

I cried again.

It was over. She was home. God had surely been with us, and His fingerprints were all over our journey. We strongly believe that before the creation of the world, God planned for Ellie to be part of our family. Before we even knew that adoption would touch our lives, He had already planned for us to parent this beautiful child. 

Adoption is such a picture of the gospel, of our adoption into God's family.  Galations 4:5 says that "God sent him to buy freedom for us who were slaves to the law, so that he could adopt us as his very own children."

“It’s important to realize, then, that we adopt not because we are rescuers. No, we adopt 
because we are rescued. And in this way, the gospel uniquely portrays, compels, and ultimately sustains adoption." - David Platt

These are horrible pictures (of pictures) and, sadly, the only two pictures we have from our arrival. It was a bit chaotic getting out of the airport with four children under 5 years old and all of our extended family.

Ce-le-brate good times, come on!

I had every intention of loading pictures of the time we spent in Antigua onto my laptop this weekend. But instead, we enjoyed the fall weather and worked in the yard. I'll let you decide which of those two was more enjoyable.

Although I don't have any pictures here to prove this, trust me that Antigua is one of the most beautiful places. It's an old city with cobblestone streets, quaint shops and restaurants alongside authentic markets. It would have been an amazing weekend had we not had this cloud of uncertainty hanging over us.

Without knowing where the missing form was, we had no date of travel. We could be there another week, another month or another year for all we knew. I was an emotional wreck. Torn between this new little one that I did not want to leave again and home - where three little boys missed Mom and Dad.

We decided that on Sunday, I would head back to Guatemala City, and Kyle would fly back to Atlanta. I would stay with Ellie, and we would pray that everything would be wrapped up quickly.

I spent Sunday and Monday of that week walking in circles of the hotel. Ellie and I would sit by the pool a while, wander through the few gift shops, do some laps in the courtyard, and go back to the room for naps. Sounds like a great vacation, right? Except for the part where I was all alone, in a country where I could communicate very little, not able to leave the safety of our hotel, and with a very fussy 2 month old.

I needed a better attitude. A change in perspective to get me out of my pity party. I walked the hotel praying and crying out to God to come through for us. My attitude didn't change instantly. I still desperately wanted to be home with my family. But peace slowly began to remove all the fear and worry, and I was able to sleep. Well, okay, maybe not that last part. But, had Ellie slept through the night, I surely could have as well.

On Monday afternoon, I received news that the infamous "pink slip" should be issued the next day. This was not expected by anyone involved with our case, so what a testimony to our God! Tuesday morning, we were given that fabulous piece of pink paper. However, now we had a new obstacle in our way. A new system had begun on Monday of that week mandating appointment times for the embassy to get baby's visa. Prior to this, as soon as pink was issued, the visa could be given the next day. Under the new system, however, it was taking as long as 1-2 weeks for an embassy appointment. 

Our agency director in Guatemala came with me to pick up our "pink slip." After 30 minutes of pleading, the embassy finally allowed us to be grandfathered in under the old system and receive Ellie's visa the next day. This meant we could go home on Friday! God had come through for us yet again. There was no other way to explain what had happened since Sunday. In a situation where we had been told there was no way we'd be home before two weeks at the earliest, God had made a way for us to be home within a week. 

"Now to him who is able to do far more abundantly than all that we ask or think, according to the power at work within us, to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, forever and ever. Amen."     Ephesians 3:20-21

throwback Thursday

I was trying to get an old video uploaded, but looks like that's not working tonight. So, instead, enjoy an old blog post from the end of my stay in Guatemala. Kinda spoils the end of the story, but I guess it's fairly obvious that at some point she did get to come home. :)

9/28/05
Ellie and I went to the US Embassy with our agency rep this morning. We breezed through in a little less than 2 hours and she was approved for her visa. We will get the visa about 5:00 tomorrow and then on to Atlanta on Friday. I still can't believe that she actually gets to come home with me!

After talking with our agency director, I see God's hand in our entire adoption. Ellie's case has gone quicker than anyone's that they've done. As our case progressed, it seemed that all of a sudden things would happen more quickly than they had been happening. For example, to enter the Guatemalan equivalent of "DFACS" (family services), you have to have pre-approval from the US Embassy. That usually takes about 7-8 weeks from the time the DNA testing is done. However, for a small window of about a month, they were getting these out within 4 weeks. Ours was in that window of time. It is now back to 7-8 weeks.

Just little things like that that others may see as "luck" I see as God's hand on our case all the way through. Then, with the events of this week, I can see God orchestrating everything.

Yesterday I read a verse that I know very well, but it took on a whole new meaning for me....Romans 8:28

"And we know that God works all things together for the good of those who love Him"

It sure doesn't promise that everything will be easy, but He does promise that He will take all the good and all the bad and make it into something good.

That something good is coming home with me on Friday.

And all I can do is say Thank you, Lord.

slumber party in my room

I'm hoping I can put a few coherent sentences together this morning. Two children decided their bedrooms were much to scary to sleep in so they made their way into the safe house of my room in the middle of the night. And they can't use their ninja-like skills and lay a sleeping bag on the floor. No. That would be much too easy. They have to wake me up (me. Not dad.) and tell me that they are coming into my room to sleep. Then there is an Oscar winning production of making the sleeping bag lie just-so and re-doing it until it's perfect. And, just when I think it's over, the snoring and teeth grinding and talking-in-their-sleep begins.

Then, the cat realized there was a slumber party going on and - well - let's just say that bell on his collar? It shall be no more as of today.

So, it's no wonder that  in this comfortable, peaceful state I could sleep so well   my brain decided to think about everything from my to-do list to how Congress could solve the nation's problems. (Really. I figured it all out! Maybe I should head to DC today!)

If you read through all that, I apologize. Seems I'm a bit touchy about my lack of sleep last night.

So - back to Ellie.

Ellie and I spent the first evening getting to know other adopting families in our hotel. We had a common bond that drew us to each other, and, even though we had just met, it was like we all instantly connected. It was incredible to hear their stories and meet all the little ones who had new families.

The next day, our agency called with the doctor appointment for Ellie. She had to have one last check-up before being cleared to go home. I called Kyle and we arranged for him to fly down in time for her appointment and stay until we could go home. Which, theoretically, should have been the day or two after that.

Kyle came in, and we all headed to the pediatrician's office. While we were sitting in the waiting room, our agency director came in and knelt down in front of us. She said she had some bad news.

Our "pink slip" - permission to travel home - had not come through. Evidently a form we needed from USCIS (citizenship and immigration services) never arrived. It should have been an easy fix.  However, ours had been filed in the New Orleans office, and since Hurricane Katrina had come through. It was completely shut down. All files were in transit to another office and no one seemed to know where or how to find them.

I was very disappointed, but not too concerned. Yet.

We were told to head to Antigua for the weekend and enjoy the time sight-seeing with our little girl. Surely things would be taken care of by Monday.

So, we arranged a hotel and travel and left for a weekend adventure to one of the most beautiful cities in the world.